There is a huge difference between being alone and loneliness. We all need to be alone from time to time to get to know ourselves. When we spend time in silence with our own thoughts we truly get to know who we are. If you can be content in your own presence then imagine how you are going to be with someone else. The key is to not allow yourself slip into loneliness. Loneliness is when you are alone and all you can think about is how empty you feel. It is not healthy to feel lonely because it can easily transition into depression. The healthy place to be is when you can sit in a room alone and not feel that you are. You are able to sit in silence and enjoy your thoughts and the silence in itself. Strive to be happy alone. If you can’t be alone with yourself why would anyone else want to be. Think about that.
I want to discuss Post Traumatic Stress and how it feels as though our souls have been stolen after a traumatic event. There are of course various levels of Trauma but no one can really say that one level is easier than another. It truly depends on a multitude of variables and it really isn’t anyone’s place to determine how each traumatic event will effect each person. Two people can go through the exact same event at the exact same time and each will process it all differently. No one person has the knowledge or power to determine another persons thoughts or emotions. Everyone of us is unique and need to process things in our own way. For society to tell us we need to just accept something and get over it isn’t realistic in a lot of cases.
I battled with PTSD myself after I was raped at the age of 12. I repressed the incident so that I wouldn’t have to face the truth and continue to relive the act over and over in my nightmares. This is how I dealt with the trauma and it almost killed me as I dealt with suicidal thoughts and attempted, thankfully I failed. The one thing in my life I can honestly say today that I am proud of being a failure at. Those thoughts can really get the better of you and for those not having them you have no way of comprehending what it is like. The only way I can try and describe it would be like this… Have you ever had a recording of something you hated play over and over and you couldn’t get the player to shut off? You feel anxious because you want it to stop but it just continues no matter what you do? It is kind of like that but the voices or images are inside your head and there is no off button to push, or power cord you can pull. Think of it like those battling with those voices and images in their head finally have enough and they make suicide their disconnection from the ultimate power source of life. Typically, they resort to these measures because they believe there is no other way to get them to stop and no one can possibly understand what they are going through. Those battling with memories of a traumatic event, continue to replay that event over and over in their minds because their brain is trying to resolve the issue and can’t change the outcome. They are the star of their own personal thriller movie in their minds and they are often scared to share with anyone for fear that no one will believe them or will believe they are weak.
No matter why, it is wrong that they should be made to feel they are the ones that did anything wrong. They need to be ensured that they are loved and that they will not be judged for the acts of others choices or even their own in some cases. Things that have happened in our past, whether that is yesterday or several years ago, can never be changed or taken back. We have to learn to acknowledge those events and history and accept who we are today. In order for us to overcome our past we have to put it in the past and not allow it to continue to tear us down in our present and definitely not let it hold us back from our future. We are on this journey together and we all need to help one another achieve the future that we were meant to have.
There is a huge difference between Limiting and Empowering Beliefs. When all you do is allow yourself to be run by your limiting beliefs you are held back and can never achieve anywhere close to your full potential. When limiting beliefs take hold they become obstacle to overcome, but if we focus on the positives and the empowering beliefs, the sky is the limit. Embracing the positives can take you to heights you had never imagined when you listen to your limiting beliefs you get held back. Focus on your positives and let your empowering beliefs allow you to soar.
Today I want to honor the amazing men and women who give their lives in sacrifice for our freedom. We all often take for granted that which we have and forget who have given their lives either in sacrifice of servicing or giving the ultimate sacrifice…Their lives for us. They give their lives the moment they take that oath and we all take it for granted. I would have been honored to have served along side these amazing people, but unfortunately was never able to do so. I am thankful everyday for the life I have and a high percentage of that is because of these men and women who chose to serve this great nation. Thank you all for all that you sacrifice everyday. I know that even those who survived still live with the memories they will never be able to erase from their minds. The experiences they have been through most of us can never imagine. So for at least today, be sure you are reaching out to those you come in contact with that have given the ultimate sacrifice and say a great big THANK YOU. We can never repay you for all you have given us.
We just can’t please everyone! Ultimately the only person you should be pleasing is yourself. If by pleasing yourself you don’t happen to please others around you in return then that isn’t all your responsibility. If you are being a good person and treating others with respect and are pleasing yourself in the process then it isn’t your job to make everyone else happy. You are and always will have yourself so be sure you are taking care of you. In the end if you please yourself you will attract people with the same goals and desires. You will attract people who want to treat you as you treat yourself and in return how you treat them.
Who is your support system? When you need to talk, vent, cry, get advice, etc. Who do you reach out to? We all need someone to turn to at times. Make sure those you have in you support system truly have your best interests in mind. We often have people in our lives that until the time comes that we truly need them they tell us they will be there for us while taking from us everyday. Then the day comes when we need that support returned and they are nowhere to be found. Be sure you are surrounding yourself with those who will give support as much as they take it. Be certain you are able to trust that they have your best interest in mind and that you have theirs as well. Having a solid support system is crucial in feeling secure and confident in yourself.
What is it depression? A feeling of loneliness? A feeling of there being no hope and not being able to change what has been done? It is a feeling no one wants but just about everyone has experienced at some level in their life. Some of us have been able to get through it, some of us have not. For a certain percentage of people, it was too much to handle and they cut there life short. For others they are still fighting it. It’s a long battle and some start to feel it’s a war they are losing but they are keeping their head up and thinking positive.
Then there are the strong ones who were able to see the good things in life and pull themselves out of it and move on. They put a smile on their face and said it is staying there no matter what happens. We can all hope we are these lucky ones that can pull themselves out of it. Some things are just too difficult to pull yourself out of for some. Death of someone held close to the heart or the loss of a loved one due to break up or divorce can be things that are just too much to pull yourself out of. Bullying and shame will cause people to do things out of desperation as well.
The key to pulling yourself out is knowing no matter what situation you are in, you have support groups. Some lean towards music, others lean towards their friends. Then there are those that have lost all friend or family support and can’t find happiness in music so what do they lean toward? Counseling or psychiatry is always a good choice. Your counselor and/or psychiatrist should know somewhere that can get you help or they personally may know how to help. The key is do not give up; suicide is never the option. No matter what you may think, your death will affect someone. There is always someone, somewhere that cares about you, whether it is a friend, family, or someone you would never have thought of. DEATH IS NEVER AN OPTION TO FIX DEPRESSION.
Remember your life matters and if you are having suicidal thoughts or know someone who is call your local Suicide Prevention Hotline. There is always someone out there that wants to listen.